Thursday, February 15, 2007
Saturday, February 3, 2007
My chaos!
I never know what's going to happen next! Every day is an adventure and I wake up asking God, "What kind of mess am I going to deal with today?" Is it wrong that I expect chaos? I feel my expectancy prepares me for the journey! I know that I'm called to live an uncomfortable lifestyle! Not just because I'm a Christian, which are called to be tested, tried, and persecuted, but because I have committed myself to a life of full time ministry!
I have had the opportunity to know many different pastors with many different styles in my experiences through ministry! Matthew Trexler, from Lakeview Wesleyan Church in Marion IN, once said something to me that I will never forget: "Never become comfortable in your ministry! If you ever find yourself comfortable, completely rearrange it or get out!" I disagreed at the time because in the ignorance of ministry mind, I thought comfortability was okay! Now, I agree more with him than ever! I'm very uncomfortable with my life and with my ministry, and it seems that God is going to work in our network of churches more than ever!
So in my chaotic life, which whoever reads this, will most likely read quite a bit about, I ask that you would pray for me! I get discouraged because my life is NOTHING that I would have ever expected it to be and NOTHING that I would ever have wanted it to be like. Within the past year, if you would have asked me at one particular time, I would have told you that my life was perfect, whole, complete, and there was nothing that I could have been given that would have made me happier than I already was! But as one of my favorite bands, Rascal Flatts, says: "Life throws you curves and YOU learned to swerve. ME, I swung and I missed..."
I missed, and I will continue to miss, that's a given! And in my time of whoofin the bat through the air, missing the ball almost every time it's thrown to me, I know that God is a last minute God, and when I'm falling fast towards the bottom of a huge cliff, God just nonchalantly sticks His hand out and catches me! I think He does that to be funny! All in all, I know He's there, and I know His grace continues to fall over me like rain! What more could I ask for?
I have had the opportunity to know many different pastors with many different styles in my experiences through ministry! Matthew Trexler, from Lakeview Wesleyan Church in Marion IN, once said something to me that I will never forget: "Never become comfortable in your ministry! If you ever find yourself comfortable, completely rearrange it or get out!" I disagreed at the time because in the ignorance of ministry mind, I thought comfortability was okay! Now, I agree more with him than ever! I'm very uncomfortable with my life and with my ministry, and it seems that God is going to work in our network of churches more than ever!
So in my chaotic life, which whoever reads this, will most likely read quite a bit about, I ask that you would pray for me! I get discouraged because my life is NOTHING that I would have ever expected it to be and NOTHING that I would ever have wanted it to be like. Within the past year, if you would have asked me at one particular time, I would have told you that my life was perfect, whole, complete, and there was nothing that I could have been given that would have made me happier than I already was! But as one of my favorite bands, Rascal Flatts, says: "Life throws you curves and YOU learned to swerve. ME, I swung and I missed..."
I missed, and I will continue to miss, that's a given! And in my time of whoofin the bat through the air, missing the ball almost every time it's thrown to me, I know that God is a last minute God, and when I'm falling fast towards the bottom of a huge cliff, God just nonchalantly sticks His hand out and catches me! I think He does that to be funny! All in all, I know He's there, and I know His grace continues to fall over me like rain! What more could I ask for?
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